To march to the beat of her own drum.

Yesterday I had a beautiful moment of clarity. I realised what I need in my life, in order address that ever present sense of feeling overwhelmed, to allow me to continue to breathe even when the busy realities of life take over. Something to stop me from almost hyperventilating when I feel like I simply cannot fit that long list into one short day. The trick to finding balance between the family I adore and my demanding career. What will enable me to shift from work to family without one or the other (or both!) falling apart?

It was a painting of a woman pounding a drum, her head was held high, her hair was flowing around her. She was at ease and in control. She was simply setting the pace. She was marching to the beat of her own drum.

I had to question why it was so meaningful and why I was so drawn to that image. What does it mean to march to the beat of your own drum? How do you know how to find the right rhythm so that everything flows and follows that beat too....

I decided it should be the beating of my heart. Our heart beats at exactly the pace we need. Sometimes a little bit faster or slower in order to meet the demands of the moment and then it steadies back into the rhythm that keeps everything in balance.

The heartbeat that can soothe a baby to sleep and keep the blood flowing through our bodies.  How vital it is and how did I not notice that it was there all along reminding me what the pace should be.

Now I can understand why I have felt so heartbroken and so out of rhythm when my life gets out of balance.

I have to learn to listen to my heart.