Thursday, 18 April 2013

I am one of those mothers.

I try so hard to be a bit more chilled out when my boys are being particularly adventurous (dangerous). I really do struggle with watching them test boundaries (tempt death). I let them climb trees and reach the upper heights of play equipment but I can't help saying 'be careful'. I know it is entirely redundant to say it, they don't listen and of course they are not actually trying to kill themselves up there.
There are several reasons for my panic and hysteria when any type of risk or harm may be involved:

1. My father.
He is the absolute King of immediate panic, fear of complete calamity and jumping to the worst case    scenario EVERY time.
He recently called me one night when I was out for a walk. I answered and chatted casually for a while when he said 'are you OK? You sound a bit out of breath!' I told him I was just walking and that I was happy to chat while I powered along. So his response to that.... "Oh thank god! I thought you must have had emphysema!!!" Please feel free to laugh out loud at his expense. Who would jump to that conclusion-  I don't smoke and I never had. I laughed when he said it and he did too. We both know it's entirely crazy and I blame him openly for my ability to see harm and injury in every innocent situation. But I still do it!

2. Campbell
He has spent too much time in the Children's Hospital- in the neurosurgery ward at that.
The number of innocent injuries that I witnessed come through the ward that led to all sorts of nasty outcomes filled me with a sense of doom and gloom before my child even reached his due date. Campbell was born 15 weeks early and needed neurosurgery before he was even supposed to be born- that has a pretty lasting impression! But these kids who just fell off trampolines, bikes, lounges.... no more on that- the world doesn't need another helicopter mother.
My introduction to motherhood, where I was going to be so relaxed and fun and easy going, warned me not to be too complaisant.

I grin manically at my children as they swing from one arm at the highest level of the frame in the playground, I wave and pretend that everything is awesome. I am really reaching for my mobile phone to call the ambulance. Despite every precaution and safe guard I have ended up with accident prone children who frequent the ER and the dentist regularly. I am quite sure that there is nobody to blame but myself. If I let them scale the fences then perhaps they wouldn't fall on their faces and deviate their septum while dancing! Maybe if I allowed them to run like maniacs downhill on concrete they wouldn't fall off stools and break their arms. Perhaps we would never have needed stitches, glue and butterfly clips (all for the same child too) if they were more frequently allowed to practise their parkoar skills. Knocking out an adult front tooth was achieved by....go on guess how...... no not by falling off his bike while pulling off an amazing jump, not while being hit by a car while playing tennis in the street...
he fell over on the lounge room tiles while chasing his brother and landed flat on his face.

I get it!!
I know there is a great big lesson in all of this.
I am trying to chill out. It's seriously hazardous to my health and my father will tell me that it will give me cancer!


  1. What a great post! So well written with great humour! I am also the queen of panic with anything to do with heads! Coop is by far my most daring child which scares me even more!

    1. Oh Bron- thanks for making me feel better. I am not alone!

  2. I think all of us who have seen what really goes on in the children's hospital are overly cautious.

    1. We will never again believe 'that will never happen to me!'

  3. Omg, I feel a little better now :) I'm forever cringing when Christian runs on concrete (clumsiest 4 yr old ever!). Every time we hear a massive thud, it's him falling off a chair, falling off the coffee table or our bed. My skin crawls with a weird fear for him. Love your posts xx

    1. Thanks Nic for validating my irrational fears- it's nice to know I am not the only one :) Thank you for reading and following- I love that you are interested.


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